Are you afraid to share your passion with others? 
Then this one’s for you.
When I launched my blog a year ago, you couldn’t even call it a launch. It was more like a quiet slipping into the blogosphere – like when you dip your toe into the pool, decide it’s too cold and uninviting, so you take it one step at a time, waiting for one part of your leg to warm up ’til you submerge the next.
That was ZenCaffeine.
The blogging world was foreign to me – it was cold and uninviting. Everyone knew what they were doing; I didn’t have a clue.
I also didn’t have support.
There was maybe one good friend who knew about my blog, and that was it. Largely, I was going at it alone.
I started my blog anyway.
As I kept going, I made feeble attempts at sharing my work. I’d kinda-sorta own my passion by telling the barista at Caribou… Only to blush the deepest red and do the palm-to-forehead upon finding my seat.
Then I told my family – and was met with insane support. I should’ve known better, but I didn’t. You always expect the worst, y’know?
It all kinda snowballed from there until one day, I’m not even sure when, I just said, “Screw it. I’m telling everyone.”
I posted ZenCaffeine as my work info on Facebook, started putting recent posts on my profile page and told my co-workers, friends, strangers – anyone who would listen. I made business cards and left them on the train, in bathrooms and any other place where they might catch someone’s eye.
I was done being afraid.
The first few encounters were nerve-wracking, I’ve gotta admit. I was practically shaking when I uttered the words: “I write a blog.”
But from there, the fear absolutely vanished. I stopped caring what the reaction would be – because I got so many good ones.
From the “That’s so cool!” to the “Really? What’s the address?”, I received so much enthusiasm.
Know what else I found?
Support.
As I released my work into the Universe, the Universe started giving back:
- My family became ultra-supportive, subscribing to my content and offering tons of praise.
- My co-workers started checking it out, and again: surprise, delight and words of encouragement.
- Strangers, instead of the “umm, okay…” that I expected, asked me what the web address was, and what I wrote about.
- I got 2 offers to help me with web design (after getting a ridiculously expensive quote from a company – literally on the same day!)
- I started connecting with other bloggers and getting support from them in the form of kind words, reviews of my blog and quoting me on their own.
- A friend, without any prompting, linked to my posts on her Pinterest. Just because she liked my work. Talk about support!
NONE of this would’ve happened if I didn’t spread the word.
None of it!
I would be writing for an audience of 2, waiting and hoping for the support to come.
Luckily, I learned:
If you’re not going to put your work out there, the support WILL NOT COME.
I didn’t wanna believe that at first. I thought that “if you build it, they will come.”
Yeah…That’s not true. This is more like it:
“If you build it and tell everyone about it, they will come and support the hell outta you.”
Is there something you’re keeping to yourself? A dream, idea or project? Are you waiting for the support to move forward?
Don’t be silly!
You need to keep working and share that work. Here’s why:
- Very few people had all the support they needed at the beginning…But they kept going anyway! Who knows where we’d be if they hadn’t? Would we have electricity? Airplanes? Don’t let lack of support hold you back.
- You can’t please everyone. So why let your fear of displeasing someone keep you from sharing? Maybe a few people won’t like it, but even more will. And the more you share, the more likely it is that you’ll come across someone who DOES like what you’re doing.
- Keeping it to yourself will NOT attract support. It’s just impossible, unless people stumble across your project or read your mind. To gain support, it has to be out there, in front of their eyes or ears.
- Sharing sets you free. When you let your work go and put it into the hands of the Universe, it’s like a sigh of relief. You’re overcoming your fear, saying “f it” to judgment. And when you get positive feedback, it’s even MORE freeing! It’s like when you’re getting a shot as a kid – you’re scared as hell, but once it’s over you feel free and brave, ’cause you did it, and it wasn’t as bad as you thought it’d be. Same thing.
- Someone out there needs it. This might be the biggest reason of all to get your work out of your head and into their hands. Whether you’re offering a unique dining experience, a home organization system or a guide to break-ups, someone out there needs what you’re offering. Maybe badly. By keeping it to yourself, you’re doing them a disservice. Get it out there.
The bottom line: You have a gift to share. Whether it’s a craft, like writing or painting, or a business idea, it’s your gift. And it’s your job to share that with others.
You might be afraid to keep going when you don’t have overwhelming support – I get it.
Keep going anyway. I promise, as you keep working and, most importantly, keep sharing, the support WILL overwhelm you. In a good way. 
By the way, if this is resonating with you – you find yourself lacking support – I just want you to know that I support you. If it excites you, I’m totally on board (as long as your dream isn’t to become a serial killer). So if you need anything at all, drop me a line. (kaylee@zencaffeine.com) I’ll help however I can – even if it’s just a “YOU CAN DO IT!” Which, by the way, you can.
Peace, love and a steaming cup of Zen,
- Kaylee
This is really inspirational, Kaylee. I know I have a tendency to hold back about my blog, too. And, as you said, that’s pretty silly. I’m going to try to follow your lead more!
When you put your heart into something, it IS hard to share it! It’s your baby, y’know? But holding it so close will just smother it. Share it and let it grow! Especially your blog – it’s fantastic! You have a stellar design and the content is always helpful; I love it! And I’m sure many others who get to see it will too..
Glad you found this inspirational, Bobbi. That’s my goal!
Very nice post Kaylee. Actually I read it few hours after a popular blogger shared my post without me having a clue and I suprisingly found a traffic to my blog I had never seen before.
Not giving up and reaching out to people pays off
Thanks Ani! Congrats on having your post shared, that’s really exciting!
It’s amazing how people are willing to reach out and help you when you put yourself out there.
I teared up while reading this Kaylee!
I’m really just starting to learn the ropes in blogging. It’s important for me to blog because I want to earn a living as a freelance writer.
Sometimes I do feel so lost and rarely do I share my blog with anyone I know personally. Most of my readers are from outside the Phils. I think i’m afraid of what kind of reaction I will get, so I just keep it quiet.
Thank you for encouraging me! Maybe I’ll finally tell ALL my relatives about my blog!
Hey Glori, first: thanks for making me smile! Second - you NEVER know what kinda reaction you’ll get unless you try! I can totally relate to the fear though – I’ve always been kind of the weirdo in the family. The introvert, the sociologist, “the Buddhist” (though now it’s more a term of endearment). I was afraid to expose myself like that, all of my introverted, Zen-inspired glory down on paper, in front of their eyes.
But like you read, it turned out great – they all read it and encourage me now. I bet you’ll find the same! And if not – brush it off! Not everyone is gonna “get” your work, but those that do will love it. More than that, they need it. You have a lot to share, Glori. Gotta stick up for us introverts!
I’m just starting to learn the ropes too; we can figure it out together! I toootally get the “lost” feeling. I felt that way for a long time – like “what the hell am I doing? I can’t compete with what’s already out there. My blog is nothing.” But it’s not – it’s my heart and soul. And that’s definitely something. So is yours!
I’m happy to encourage, Glori. That’s one of my goals.
Lemme know how the big reveal goes, ok? 
Absolutely love this Kaylee! I know where you were coming from. When I first started, I was terrified! And there was this little voice that said who did I think I was who thought I might have something to offer. That first step of putting it out there is so important. I’ve found that now it is hard to imagine what I was so scared about. And I really, really love what I do!
The end of your comment made me so happy, Claire. Like goosebumps and big smiles happy. I love happy endings.
Though it’s not really an ending – but I’m glad you’re living the dream!
I’m very familiar with that little voice…It still pops in every once in a while, but most of the time I can give it a swift elbow nudge and it goes away.
That first step really was the catalyst though, like ya said; once I told one person, it just snowballed into one big giant “HEY everyone! I blog at ZenCaffeine!!” It’s a great feeling to finally take ownership.
Thanks Linda!
Ha ha, we’ll see if your encouragement worked. Grandpa? Dad?
You’re right though, that support is precious. They’re always there to keep me going when I feel like giving up. I love them for it!
The spacing was a little intense, but this was definitely one of your best posts! Given that 1) it resonates with me, and 2) it was well written, I felt myself totally absorbed by the article.
I have a hard time telling others what I’m doing; I’ve only told my closest friends. Most people know me as an entrepreneur/consultant/economist/etc… The disconnect between that image and my current reality is quiet large. I haven’t been able to tell my family, because I am afraid of their criticism (WTF!, we paid for part of your super expensive NYU college tuition for you to write a &$(ing blog!). I have a hard time telling strangers because I feel weird talking about what I write about, and because I don’t want them to read what I’ve written. In other jobs, you can’t see other’s work. In this one, it’s completely visible.
BUT, I know you’re right. So, I’ve decided that at the party I’m going to tonight, I’m going to tell everyone, “I’m a small business owner whose primary vehicle is a positive psychology blog.” We’ll see how it goes … Thanks!
Thanks Amit! I’m glad you liked it and that it resonated with you. I did try to fix the spacing a bit – is that any better?
I totally feel ya on the telling strangers part..But what’s helped me get over that (at least a little) is coming up with my answer before they ask. Before, they’d ask “what do you write about?” and I’d fumble and say, “Wellll… I write about meditation and stuff like that…” and just pray they didn’t ask any more questions.
Now, I kind of have an answer ready. I asked *myself* : “what do you write about?” And my answer is a little better now: I write about meditation and being present, and helping people to wake up to life and their full potential (though if I’m honest, I’m still hesitant to say that last part). But yeah, having a solid answer ready might help that reluctance – and I’m sure your statement will be followed up with “a positive psychology blog? what do you write about?” (they always ask! Grr..
)
Ok now what I REALLY wanna know – how did it go?!
You are absolutely right – they did ask, and I didn’t have an answer ready
One person was like – oh psychology, do you write about messed up people? I definitely need to work on that part for next time.
It actually went really well though. One person even called me their hero (for quitting wall-street). With that positive experience behind me, I decided to tell my parents. That went surprisingly well. I’m still not sure if they were secretly seething and just pretended to be supportive, but they told me they understood what I was doing was difficult, and that I shouldn’t hesitate to ask for financial support if I need it. I’ve gotta say, even if they were pretending, it went a hell of a lot better than I expected. Thanks Kaylee!
Ah, the questions people ask can be so interesting… I got asked if I float during meditation before (seriously.) Ha ha..
But hey, that’s AWESOME that you went for it!! Don’t you feel way better? And it only gets easier from there. Whether or not your folks were pretending, I’m sure they’ll get on board as your blog grows. Hell, I’m sure once they just SEE your blog they’ll be supportive. It just looks so legit, and I can totally see it going places.
Anywho, no problem Amit! Gotta give you a big congrats, ’cause that initial unveiling is tough. I can’t wait to see what kinda support you gain as you keep going!! It only gets better!
BTW, a little hint: tell EVERYONE about it, because you never know where you’ll get a connection. Just this morning, I told my dentist, and guess what? She’s taking a meditation class right now and is gonna check out my blog. We’re even talking about me helping her make a blog for her practice! The Universe loves when you put yourself out there, I guess!
I know exactly your feelings here Kaylee! it took me a while to get comfy talking about my online existence with my “real world” friends. And for all those reasons you mention, I’ve slowly busted out of that resistance. Some people still raise eyebrows and wonder why I spend so much time with this. But others are thrilled and want to visit my site. We have to own who we are and what we’re doing! Thanks for this post that helps me stay on track!
Glad I’m not alone Sarah! I occasionally get the raised eyebrows too, but whatever. Not everyone is gonna get it, and that’s fine. Nothin’ you can do!
And man, talk about owning who we are and what we’re doing – your blog launch was killer!! If that’s not owning your work, I don’t know what is. Glad I could help you stay on track – and thank *you* for being a fine example. Peace and another huge congrats on an awesome launch!
Great post Kaylee…I can totally relate to those feelings of when you first got started with your blog. Its like we wait somehow for some kind of permission to be ourselves and then we realise that when we just get on with being who we are, sharing our souls, our dreams, our most honest feelings then we connect and the Universe assists us. Of course, we need to take the action but first we’ve got to find the courage to be who we want to be and then master letting go.
Thanks Kath! Man, what you said was just spot on: “Its like we wait somehow for some kind of permission to be ourselves and then we realise that when we just get on with being who we are, sharing our souls, our dreams, our most honest feelings then we connect and the Universe assists us.” Yes. Exactly!
It’s definitely not easy, and it’s something I still struggle with sometimes. Like I still feel as if I’m waiting for permission to be myself in some situations…But you said it perfectly – if I just get on with being who I am, it’ll all be good!
Thanks for sharing Kath, I really appreciate your insight.
Kaylee,
I love this post. We need these reminders. As bloggers, and as just general creative types engaged in what is still “unconventional” work, it’s difficult to tell conventional people what we do. I know people who don’t even know what a blog is, and these are the people who are in their thirties and forties.
All the things you have said, about putting yourself out there, are essential. They are not easy of course, because at some point, we are likely to face a rejection or a laugh. But on the whole, people are supportive. They are encouraging. Even if they aren’t, it’s our work and we should be damn well proud of it.
Hey Dolly! I knew my fellow bloggers would really understand this one. It’s hard to share this kinda work when you’re not sure people will get it or be on board.
But you’re right - even if they aren’t, we should be proud of it! It’s our heart and soul, and having the courage to put it out into the world like that is pretty awesome and worth being proud of.
Kaylee – This post relates to most things/events/dreams in life. If we do not pursue our dream it ceases to become a dream – it is only a whisper of an idea. I love the part about “owning” our dream. I also believe that there are dream/passion “suckers” out there who minimize, criticize, belittle, etc our dreams. I have learned to share but also hold a piece of the big dream close to my heart. It’s like protecting my soul. In fact, one of my closest friends is so critical/envious that I stopped sharing with her. The drive to pursue my passion (art) is a personal mission between my soul and God…and others who support me. The rest is white noise.
Hey Jane. I love your attitude about sharing – it sounds like you do it pretty freely, but also know when to stop, and how much to hold back. It’s true, there are passion suckers out there – and if you know who they are, you’re better off not sharing with them. It’s too bad one of those people is a close friend, but envy does crazy things to people.
Thanks for sharing your perspective, Jane.
Hi Kaylee,
This was a such an inspiring post with so much amazing advice in it. What I
loved about it is, it is from your own direct experience and growth.
I could definitely relate to a number of points you raised in your post. They
have been times when I too have been fearful of telling others about my
thoughts and plans for the future. However, I’ve found in probably all of the
occasions (and like you also said), after I told people, it felt liberating and
even more importantly, my support structure for helping me achieve what I
wanted to increased tremendously.
Many people are willing to help us. We just need to give them the opportunity
to do so.
Hi Hiten.
Thank you for your kind words! I’m glad you found it inspiring. It’s easiest and the most fun to write about your own experiences, don’t you think? And the most effective, clearly!
“Many people are willing to help us. We just need to give them the opportunity to do so.” – Bingo! Let go of how you expect people to react and give ‘em a chance to surprise you.
Thanks for reading. I always love seeing you here!
Great post that did in fact resonate. Somehow I have always gotten attention in business. But recently I realized that what I want to get out there really can seriously help how so many people feel every single day… and I want to find all of those people.
Difficult without a lot of support. So sincere mahalo for yours and the ideas to reach out now and get my thing out there. I’m not one that wants to be a salesy pain in the ass, but you are right. There are so many that when they find it, support it, need it want it. The rest I can leave be the way they want to be!
Great
post that did in fact resonate. Somehow I have always gotten attention
in business. But recently I realized that what I want to get out there
really can seriously help how so many people feel every single day…
and I want to find all of those people.
Difficult without a lot of support. So sincere mahalo for yours and
the ideas to reach out now and get my thing out there. I’m not one that
wants to be a salesy pain in the ass, but you are right. There are so
many that when they find it, support it, need it want it. The rest I
can leave be the way they want to be!
Hey Jt, glad this got to you at the right time.
I tooootally hear you on not wanting to be a “salesy pain in the ass” – I worked in sales for a little while, and oh MAN was I terrible at it. I hate bothering people! But it helps to look at it like you were saying: you know what you have to offer can help how people feel. In that case, you’re not bothering those people, and the folks you do bother don’t need your services anway, so peace out to them! I hope you get your offer out to the folks who need it – it sure seems like you’re well on your way. Best wishes, Jt!
Thankyou so much for your words Kaylee! I found your blog a few months ago, around the same time I started my own. I literally just today “launched” it on facebook and have been getting some awesome responses, love and support. I don’t know what I was so afraid of! I completely resonate with your experience, I still have a ton more to learn about the blogging world to get to the point of feeling completely comfortable but it’s reassuring I’m not the only one who has these fears and made up self-doubts… why do you we do that to ourselves? Love all the content I’ve read so far, I’ll be following!
Sending love and good vibes,
Jasmine
Hey Jasmine, thanks for speaking out! I’m glad to hear from you in the comments. =)
Congrats on the launch, girl!! For me, that was one of the scariest steps…But now that you’ve done that, the rest should be easy peasy. It’s amazing the support you find, isn’t it? People just come outta nowhere with more encouragement than you ever expected. It’s awesome. =)
Anywhooo, I’m so glad you’ll be following, Jasmine! I checked out your blog and so much of it resonates with me. You’re totally a kindred spirit! I’m still kind of a newbie, but have stumbled through my first year of blogging…so if you ever need anything at all, drop me a line @ kaylee [at] zencaffeine [dot] com.
Peace and love,
K
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